Coming to the end of another crazy year, I sigh with a sense of relief. Having two boys taking the PSLE exams two years in a row and now that everything is over with the new school year starting in less than a week, suddenly it all seems like I am now on cruise control. My closest friends, though not many, know me as one who is laid back and passive parenting seems like an easier choice for me. Lead by example. If you yell at your kids, they will yell at you at some point. You speak respectfully to the people around you, your children will naturally emulate. When my boys fumble, I also reflect upon myself. Maybe I did the same and they think its alright too. They are only 12, you think they can decide what's right or wrong? To a large extend, they are really just kids. That's why I take a step back and put myself in their shoes. Its not easy being a child in Singapore. In academic terms, there's just too much to study in a year, they are continuingly fighting for time, tests after tests, exams after exams. We seem like a happier bunch. There's much more a stigma to fail your exams these days than years ago. After exams, my motto for them is "play all you want!". However, when its time for serious work, your kids need to know to stow their gadgets aside, at least for a while. Not easy though.
I was extremely pleased with 2012. My junior passed his exams and I know he did his best, that's what I need him to do regardless of the outcome. He did not disappoint me yet surprised me. He even proved a teacher wrong. When a teachers tells you that your child is limited, you ask yourself if its true or you try to prove her wrong. I did not tell my child the teacher shared this anecdote with us, how could I? It was only when my child drive home an A for that subject that I told him that to have faith in oneself. Only you and you alone can decide what you want in life and never let anyone tell you that you are finished or cannot ever succeed.
As the days go by, everyone gets on with their own lives. I get preoccupied with my immediate family. I don't see my folks, siblings, nieces and nephews as often as I would like. I try to make an extra effort to make time for them, even if I have to break my routine once in a while. I think I am entitled to a bit of flexibility. A break from routine is also refreshing to the soul. It doesn't need to be a big family outing. I realise a short drive to mum's place, for coffee and some good time chat and nibbles brings the family closer. I am glad I don't need to take a plane to see my folks and siblings.
I have many expatriate friends and I can see how much they misses their friends and families when they make Singapore their second home. I don't blame them for dashing out of Singapore the moment school vacation starts. There's no place like home.
I spend most of my Christmas holidays going through my photos and videos I made over the years. I particularly enjoyed watching my kids when their were babies and little tiny tots. I often look at stranger's babies and envy the moment they have with their child. But I quickly recall that I too had my moment years ago and I did savour it like they did. The videos do help me remember and to relive those moments very vividly.
With the year coming to an end, I wish to embrace 2013 like a new friend. I want to get to know the world better. Break some routine, get out of my comfort zone. Talk less, see more...maybe eat less. As much as I enjoy my food exploration, I am hoping to introduce more greens into my diet. Cut out the fatty food. Eat 70% full. This may sound like a new year resolution set to fail. I am not sure if I have to put all these writing on the wall to remind me not to eat the skin of fried chicken (KFC). Someone's going to eat it, so am I making someone else eat my fats? I think small steps are a better bet than giant leaps. I have forgotten how my gym looks like now. I gave myself too many excuses.
Its wonderful to see photos on Facebook of family get together, over a meal, at a park, a beach. I wish to see more of these than reading if Mr X likes Carlsberg or likes Scoot. Please do not get upset if you find yourself having lesser friends, if you are even keeping track. There will be one or two people you have befriended but have made no difference to your lives, feel free to delete them. There's a high chance that you have also been deleted from some of your friend's account. There's no need to stress over FB. If you find that you need to get gratifications from seeing 101 likes on your food post, go get a life. If you don't like what you read or see, just move on.
In this festive season, just spare a thought for those lonely people out there. Some you know, some you don't. In your own way, just pray for those whose family are torn apart in some ways you won't ever understand. Do not judge. Some are suicidal, some are sadden and lost in this big big world. They have no friends to turn to. Best friends are not in their vocabulary. A few kind words for them could sometimes save their lives. As the world becomes more and more a cruel place, with mindless killings, shooting incidents and irresponsible hit and runs, causing loss of lives, let us just pray in our own faith that the coming new year and many years to come bring more peace to the world. Peace within the family, within oneself, inner peace. Surround us with more love and harmony. Keep it simple. All we need is LOVE.
Happy New Year to all my love ones and friends and those dropping by to read my ramblings. Take lots of photos of your loved ones, places you visit, things you have, food you eat...
To my spouse, my boys, family and friends, I luv ya.
Shaz
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