Last week at the office, there were flowers everywhere. Valentine's Day is still months away and I was wondering what's with the men sending flowers to their wives at work and they all seem to want to outdo one other. To a point, I suspected the ladies buy themselves flowers, just to get at each other. They then went on to publish their gorgeous bouquets on Facebook for all to see. Honestly, I envied them to death. The flowers just screams I LOVE YOU AND I DON'T MIND SPENDING $80 ON A PERISHABLE JUST TO MAKE YOUR DAY. Flowers just have this effect. I couldn't help but felt a little jealous and so did a few of my other colleagues who are shamelessly asking their boyfriends to buy them flowers like NOW! Being a sour grape, I nudged one of them on Facebook, asking them what was the occasion? If it wasn't a birthday or an anniversary, then it could only mean one thing. THE MEN ARE GUILTY. But having once owned a flower shop, there are 1001 reasons to buy flowers. But I can also now conclude that there will be some men who will be more romantic than others, or your own spouse.
I will kill the next person who thinks white men are more romantic than our local Chinese men. But I sometimes blame the ladies for being a scrooge or maybe we are a more practical lot and we know money are hard earned and one should never waste them on things that wouldn't last. And so the men took it literally. So they would tell their men not to buy them flowers yet they all become green-eyed monsters when the secretary gets a bunch of striking red roses that adorn her desk for 3 days before they turn brown and floppy. Some men are just born to romance. They have a way to make the girls go weak and some girls just falls hopelessly in love, and get haplessly hurt when things go wrong. Although I wouldn't mind getting flowers on a dull day at work, I think I would be too stunned to get flowers that I'd be attention deficit and would just gawk at the flowers and not get back on task. But I think if I'd ever get a bunch, it'll probably be a sorry bouquet cuz my husband and I are past that stage. We don't need such outward declaration of love. Making me a cup of coffee, buying the weekend papers, sending me to work on a rainy day does it for me. The honeymoon is over but we are now going on a long haul.
I told my husband before we got married, Love Me As A Package. You can't pick and choose. I wasn't pimply, I had an ok face, I wasn't too short, too tall, but too bad I don't have Cameron Diaz legs or Scarlett Johansson's bosoms. Take it or leave it. I also accepted him for who he was. A Mr Nice Guy, an ok face, wasn't too short nor too tall, no six packs or a Calvin Klein underwear model wannabe. Personality and sense of humour goes a longer way. Someone told me to invest more time with my spouse than my children. Radical but I think this person has a point. Once our parental duties diminish, you are going to be stuck with this person till death do us part. People generally scratch the surface of things. Oh look at Mr Jones, so romantic, always this and that. But is Mr Jones the kind that would take your mother out. Be thankful your man loves your mum like his own. How he treats his mum and yours, he will love you just the same. Just look around, there's some truth. But there's a thin line bewteen loving your mum and being tied to her apron string. Subtle difference but we all know that can be catastrophic. I have boys and I know I want to be tied to my boys for as long as I live. We just have to know when to let go.
Do we marry our soulmates, one will never know till the very end. My parents are always on each other's nerves, yet they are together for over 40 years. They have gotten used to each other habits, good and bad. Mum tells me Dad drives her crazy, I would reply to her that that was the very reason she chose to marry him!!! I will continue to pick my husband's dirty socks, rearrange his wardrobe cuz he will continue to pull his favourite tee-shirt from the bottom of the pile and messes up. He will disapprovingly put my towel back on the bathroom towel rack, remove the shells from prawns so my fingers remain clean, rescue me from bus stops during heavy downpours cuz I hate carrying umbrellas. Nobody does it better than the one we marry. Its simply loving unconditionally.
Nevermind if you don't bring me flowers, just bring back a tub of ice cream on the way back from the petrol station. The next time you wish to surprise your spouse, cook her a meal instead. Poor culinary skills? Go to a hawker centre western food joint, take away and rearrange your chicken chop on your own plate, steal some tea lights from her stash, bingo, you got your instant DIY for cheats. If you really need flowers, a single 60 cents stalk from the market has the same effect as a $60 bouquet. Or even better, give her a foot rub, hold her so close and tell her how much you love her. Who needs flowers?
...Happy belated Anniversary dear, btw you owe me 13 stalks....one for each year we have been married...
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