Staying positive is the key to many successes in life. Its a mechanism that tunes your inner gut to control your brain by telling the bad guy who is lurking in an obscure corner, to get the hell out of your path. Many times our own negativity can become an obstacle in our pursuit for better things in life.
To be deeply happy for a person in his successes in life is often hard to do without feeling a tinge of envy...the bad kind. A spanking new car, a designer apartment or a good class bungalow, a dream job with a fat paycheck and all expense paid trip. A winning formula to make any average Joe cringe and wallow in self pity. Nothing wrong feeling this way and nothing wrong with Mr High Net Worth (Mr HNW) flashing his wealth. He works hard for his money. No one knows how much sacrifices he has made, how many labourious hours he clocked at work, how much hell he faced from his boss, after all we only see the fruits of his labour.
So Mr HNW post photos of his ski trip, beautiful and recognisable landmarks of the world drapes the background. He checks into one of the finest Michelin-star restaurant, parties at Pangea, gets invited to the Paddock with F1 drivers with poses with them holding a glass of Moet and just about everything that shouts ENVY...very green indeed. Nothing much you can do about it. You basically start blaming your folks for not sending you to a top University, blame your grandparents giving birth to your parents, friends or worse your spouse for keeping you home leaving you no time to network with Mr HNW. Ouch that hurts.
I really hate whoever coined term "high flyer" which my colleague uses time and again. "Oh my friend has no time for me, she's a high flyer..." So what makes me? A "low flyer"? A certain amount of success in life culminates to being happy. I am constantly harping on the Happiness Quotient (HQ) in my life. I am consciously seeking a higher level of happiness. Your HQ differs from every Tom, Dick, Harry, Peter, Paul and Mary. I can be happy earning $5K a month while Miss High Flyer earns $20K. Sure, her pocket is indeed deeper and while she wears Prada, I wear Bata. I probably sleep better than her and perhaps my Bata is better cushioned than her Prada and she could get blisters, corns and bunions. "wink"
Life has got no meaning if we chase the warped kind of happiness. I was going home one day when I saw a man, hunched over seated on the floor at the bus interchange. He seem shorter than an average person which I believed he probaby had a stunted growth. He could probably walk as I see no walking aid near him and could possibly find a job you may say. However if society scorns and thinks this person is unable to contribute to the work force, he has no choice but to beg. We have been listed as the richest nation in the world but we have yet to become one of the most generous people around. Can't we give unconditionally? You can always give from the heart. Compassion. Share. Don't question. I dug into my not so fat wallet, drop a note into his plastic tray, he gave me a half smile, but it made me happy all the same. I am not sure how far my $2 can take him but I parted a little of what I have to make things a little better for a fellow human. A few others acknowledged his presence, some walked away but made an unexpected u-turn for him. Many thought he was a rubbish bin. I did a mental note how many stopped to give, the results were astoundingly disappointing. To be able to give, no matter how little, that's an intangible happiness, to me that is a form of success in life.
To have love and unity in the family or to have all the money in the world. Tough choice but keeping all things constant, we will choose the former. We have heard too many stories of people having money and no love. People having money to buy love. Lets not dwell with those who have no money and no love. People being abandoned because they have no money. Quite recently, a lady in Singapore won a jackpot at one of our casinos but the casino was defaulting the payout and wanted to compensate her with a car. She brought them to court and won. She won big. Friends, relatives and even strangers all wanted a share of her winnings, all wanting her to be a good samaritan. Due to the lawsuit, she became a household face and when the pressure became too great, she did the unthinkable (for some) - she gave them all away to charity....in order to tell the world, "hey, don't come to me, I have no money now, so who's my friend now?". Isn't this how the world works, we want to be friends with the rich but not the poor. People drop names just to be one step above you.
Be friends with people from all levels of society. One of the top executive in my workplace will never smile at me. I haven't stopped smiling at her. Will she relent one day - I don't know. Perhaps to me, I had no place in her life. I was made to feel like a microscopic germ. A top executive but totally devoid of any basic manners. Is she successful? On the contrary, the cleaning lady on my floor, she is success personified. A lovely lady, faces trash everyday but her friendly disposition makes all the difference...and I still feel bad she has to clean my desk. So I make her work a little easier, I try to keep my desk clean and tells her my desk need no cleaning, probably once a fortnight for a thorough scrub.
I want to teach my children, that a good education alone does not make one a success material. Its about how you treat your friends, your parents, grandparents, the gardener who sweeps the courtyard. Attending an elite school should not breed arrogance and cockiness. Its a privilege, that's all. All of us want to become people of good character. Having straight As does not equate having a straight A character. Best to be remembered as one with an upright character, one who cares about society, the environment and most importantly knowing how to respect another fellow human being. That to me epitomise success.
No comments:
Post a Comment